jointstereotype: Hey, man. Did you and Minnie make up?

rygar: No. She's busy.

jointstereotype: Oh. How's baconbutts.com coming along?

rygar: Lousy. My feng-shui's off.

jointstereotype: What, like your desk is facing away from the door or something?

rygar: No, my room's fine. It's my desktop that's giving me trouble.

jointstereotype: Maybe you should try clearing away the nacho cartons and beer cans once in a while.

rygar: I'm talking about the desktop environment on my computer. I can't find a theme that does the job. I've been at it since last time we chatted and this is all I've got:

jointstereotype: O.o That is the ugliest, most cluttered desktop I've ever seen—wait, you mean to tell me you've been searching for GNOME themes since Thursday??

rygar: Help me.

jointstereotype: I don't know if I can. You may be too far-gone already.

rygar: Water...bring me water. And a fresh change of clothes. And headache medicine.

jointstereotype: I've got a better idea: Ignore the flippin' theme and just get your work done.

rygar: I can't. It's...it's distracting. In Windows XP you had either M&Ms or grey. In GNOME you have a billion different engines, round windows borders and squared window borders, Crystal-based icon themes, Tango-based icon themes, light application themes, dark application themes—

jointstereotype: Relax. Take a deep breath.

rygar: Okay...okay, I'm taking a deep breath...

jointstereotype: Now, hit the power button.

rygar: Without shutting down first?

jointstereotype: Trust me.

rygar: I...I can't do it...I don't know if I have any changes that need to be saved...

jointstereotype: You can do it. Press the power button.

rygar: ...

jointstereotype: Still with me?

jointstereotype: Max, old buddy?

rygar: There. I did it. I hit the power button.

jointstereotype: Better?

rygar: Yeah...yeah, you know...the feeling's coming back to my fingers. My thoughts are becoming coherent again. Wow. Thanks, man. The power button! How'd you know?

jointstereotype: TMOS—Too Many Options Syndrome—can be a bugger, but like most other computer-related ailments (Imagefap Wrist, Google Disease, and GLMFC Syndrome—"Girls Lower My Frag Count Syndrome"—to name a few), it only presents a danger when the power is on.

rygar: Dude, I owe you big. If you want your Futurama season 2 boxed set back, consider it done.

jointstereotype: And here I thought I'd misplaced it. You bastard.